Hello! I am Abdul Johammed, a very rich prince from Nigeria and I am contacting you today to offer you the financial oppurtunity of your fucking lifetime!

They Won't Stay Dead is a zombie infested brain eating goresoaked three piece thrash outfit from the Boston area that is sure to delight your children's show, birthday party, or bar mitzvah. However, they are banned in my country, so for the small bank transaction fee of 1,200$ we will send them to your country of freedoms and the Krispy Kreme.

If you would like to associate yourself with such a crue of vagabonds, you can contact their meaty sasquatch vocalist Mike at (508) 291-5021, because he has no internet ever since the very big fire. It is sad! Ho ho ho! Leave a message for he is often drunk and in prison! Delightful!

Jinnqui & Yeg Skemesh!

Your Excellency,
Prince Abdul Johammed III


(p.s: please fucking book us)

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Lordy loo, TWSD is a very fine young band and work magic in the kitchen! Give them your moneys right now!

Second best gore metal splatterthrash band in Boston next to Dissector, of course.

Book this band. Thier drummer is... well amazing.

We wanna play with you

I'm playing with my scrotum.

Help deese niggas out.

Scoracrasia said:

me too

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why this isnt the biggest band in boston right now, i have no fucking idea.

if you book them, they will come.

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Sheeky scrotum looker.

I may have to book an all-zombie show.

Does TWSD have a website with mp3's?

Answer me immediately.

RichHorror said:

Soon enough, gentle jerkwad!