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:	post by Davidfromthegravid at 2005-07-13 22:22:03

(Saugus, MA) This just in:

Nototrious East Manor kiddie toucher correctly identified as sketchy discussion board lurker, Davefromthegrave, was apprehended Monday night in a shocking child sex-ring dragnet. Police were clued into his abhorrent (not cool in a metal way) lifestyle due to his countess "jokes" about kids, penises, lil'amber, and Manowar references on the famous Return To The Pit web chat forum.
An anonomous board member was quoted as saying that "Dave never really fit in and everyone thought that he was pretty creepy. Plus, he had this thing for Lita Ford which, despite her collaboration with Ozzy, is totally uncool."
Davefromthegrave was lured into a bizare sex trap by Sargeant Amber Jacobs (aka lil' Amber) and her partner, Joey DeMaio (aka lead singer of Manowar) at a Saugus, MA rest stop. Davefromthegrave was unable to make the $20,000 bail. His relatives were surprised when his metal collection only yeilded $40 on ebay. Apparently people just aren't paying much for Faster Pussycat anymore.

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